Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales

A season of long and infinitely stupid movies. In the first half hour, there are a few candid ideas, then it's just two types of misery porn: you can watch mischievously as the screenwriters have a hard time with it and try to connect the plot so that it makes sense at least a little bit, and you can watch Depp even more mischievously, who clearly finds more of himself than he would like in the role of a bankrupt pirate feeding on self-deception. Joachim Rønning / Espen Sandberg do a solid job, but this ship leaks more than the Kon-Tiki. (17/09/2017)

After so many times, the characters have lost some of their zest and are no longer than interesting. Barbossa is still scowling, Sparrow is still doing the same crap, and maybe only one or two scenes are really funny. And to make sure it's not just sterile grey and a variation on the same scripted tripe a hundred times over, new faces and new plot pieces are added to the puzzle. The creators have certainly made a very bold effort to move forward, and the phenomenal stunts this time are well complemented by a fast pace and very clear action. It's not nearly as pompous and bombastic as the madcap previous two episodes, but it's still, not and probably never will be as balanced and inventive as the first one was. The pirates are dead and stale stuff even if Depp was walking on his head. (08/06/2017)

The pirates are back after six years and the longer hiatus has probably been good for them, as this is one of the best episodes. The high budget is definitely evident (there are speculations that it was as high as 300 million, some say 400, IMDB says 230 million, I don't know who is right, but I find 230 more believable). The film has a decent pace, nice new characters, especially Kaya Scodelario is a feast for the eyes, but Javier Bardem as the bad guy was also decently scary. Jack Sparrow is still the same. The highlight for me was the dead rotten sharks, something I haven’t seen anywhere, and the spectacular finale. What sucks is that there are no sword fights, most of the action is between ships. The film deserves to be seen in theatres for the visuals alone. 80%. (27/05/2017)

The production design and the effects are great, as only Bruckheimer's bottomless wallet can do, but the fifth encounter with Jack Sparrow is like meeting a drunk who tells you funny stories and you don't want to listen to him anymore because he's annoying. He just drunkenly drones on and on and on and you get tired of it :o) (29/09/2017)

The Pirates of the Caribbean films were never clever but they were funny, entertaining, and catchy. In my opinion, with the fifth film of the series, they reached a stage of rotting where it hardly affects me anymore. The film doesn't even offend me and just evokes indifference and boredom. Perhaps I'm slightly concerned about the IQ of the target audience. If this kind of silly infantile entertainment can justify its existence and fill up cash registers, society is not heading toward a brighter future... Overall impression: 20% for the set design and special effects. (25/02/2022)